The Final Fling |
Planning & Traditions for Pre-Wedding Celebrations |
There are so many traditional and some not-so-traditional
parties attended with the plans for an upcoming wedding. |
|
THE BRIDAL SHOWER
There are several people involved in your wedding plans who may
want to get together to throw the bride a shower. It is also not
unusual for several different groups to wish to host a shower. |
|
The traditional bridal shower is usually given by the
maid/matron of honor in conjunction with the mother of the
bride, the bridesmaids, and other important women in the bride's
family or circle of friends. Sunday afternoon is the most
popular time for a bridal shower. The boys are at home "watching
football" and the girls are free for the afternoon. The
invitation should be handwritten and casual, and nowadays, a
telephone invitation is more than acceptable, especially if the
shower is to be a surprise. An RSVP on the written invitations
is necessary only for those who will not be attending, just to
get your catering plans laid out. |
|
The style of the party, anything from a formal "afternoon
tea" to an outdoor barbecue, should be considered from the angle
of the bride: Plan a party at which the guest of honor will feel
most comfortable. Don't plan an English Garden Party for a woman
who lives in jeans and sneakers, anymore than you would plan a
picnic for someone who prefers evening dresses. |
|
The principle shower should be hosted by those closest to
the bride and these decisions should be a snap for those who
know her best. |
|
The same goes for planning a "theme" and/or other activities
at the party. Structure the get-together to relax and honor the
bride; don't look at it from the angle of what you would like if
you were the future bride. |
|
|
|
|
There are others who may want to throw a bridal shower with
their own special theme or meaning such as "the girls at work"
or sorority sisters, and all efforts along these lines are
special and will be appreciated. The main things to remember
are: |
|
a: Check your dates first to make sure that no conflict
arises with any of the other more traditional festivities, and |
|
b: be sure to include the principles from the wedding plans
such as the maid/matron of honor and the bride's mother to avoid
hard feelings or duplication. |
|
THE DOUBLE SHOWER
The double shower is a fairly unique phenomenon to southern New
England. Originally, this function was a combination of the
antiquated engagement party, which is now almost in ways a
private affair or immediate family, and the other attendants
parties preceding a wedding: the bachelor party, bridal showers,
bachelorette party. But it grew to take on other meanings that
are clearly avoided these days: The bride and groom are "in a
hurry"; the family can't afford a big wedding and the proceeds
from this party will offset the costs of the wedding; this is a
rehearsal for the big day and we can hit up the members of our
family twice for the same thing. And so, the double shower is an
infrequent occurrence these days. |
|
The main thing to remember is that a double shower should serve
some primary function towards your wedding plans. Maybe the
bride and groom are in a hurry: one of them has a job offer and
they must relocate quickly, but would like to be married at home
before they leave! |
|
Whatever your reasons for having a double shower, make sure that
you are not duplicating the reasons for other parties and that
you are not overextending the kindness and generosity of your
guests. |
|
THE BACHELOR PARTY
The bachelor party is clearly the realm of the best man, with
guidance from the father of the groom and the invitees: |
|
a: an evening of complete debauchery taking in strip club
nightspots, gambling palace and a late night eatery. |
|
b: tickets to a ball game and bite to eat at a quiet restaurant,
where you'll have an opportunity to reminisce |
|
|
Whatever the plans are (we'll leave that to your
imaginations!) just follow 2 simple rules: |
|
1: Plan to show the groom a good
time; plan to honor and entertain the groom according to his
personal style, not according to how you'd like your bachelor
party to be. |
|
2: Rent a limousine or (seriously)
appoint a designated driver. As they say, the rest is up to
him.... |
|
|
|
THE BACHELORETTE PARTY
As with the bachelor party, the bachelorette party is in the
realm of the maid or matron of honor. From male strippers to a
slumber party, follow the guidelines from above: what will the
bride be comfortable with and what will make this a night to
remember for her. |
